Dear President Obama,
I know you're busy writing tonight's State of the Union address, the talking points for which are here, but I thought I might offer a few suggestions for things you'd want to add. Some of these are better for you than others. Sorry about that, but real friends are going to be straight with you, right?
So, if you'll just follow me over the Orange Squiggly Thing, here are my suggestions. Hopefully, my readers and fellow Kossacks will leave their own suggestions in the comments. I'll leave it to you to work on the exact language.